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Concert

by hasira · about 10 min read

The first thing Kiro noticed was the heat.

Not the music.

Not the lights.

Heat.

The second the door closed behind them, cold evening air disappeared.

People.

Jackets.

Bodies.

Old wood.

Beer.

Something sweet he couldn't identify.

And underneath all of it, bass.

Heavy enough that he felt it through the floor before he properly heard it.

Kiro stopped.

Susie stopped with him.

Her paw was still holding his.

Susieto Kiro

“You okay?”

Kiro looked around

The venue was smaller than he'd imagined.

Also somehow more crowded.

A narrow room opened ahead of them.

Bar along one wall.

Small stage at the other end.

Dark ceiling.

Posters everywhere.

Most of them layered over older posters.

Maybe a hundred people already inside.

Maybe less.

It felt like five hundred.

Someone brushed past Kiro from behind.

He moved closer to Susie automatically.

Kiro

“Sorry.”

Susie looked at him.

Susieto Kiro

“For what?”

Kiro realized.

Kiroto Susie

“Nothing.”

Susieto Kiro

“Good.”

She squeezed his paw once.

Susieto Kiro

“Come on.”

They moved deeper inside.

The opening band was already playing.

Kiro didn't know them.

Didn't matter.

The sound was completely different from speakers at home.

Messier.

Bigger.

The drums hit his chest.

Guitar filled everything between his ears.

Bass traveled through the floor and up his legs.

Kiro stared at the stage.

Kiro

“Holy shit.”

Susie leaned closer.

Susieto Kiro

“What?”

Kiro turned toward her.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

She laughed.

He could barely hear her.

Kiro realized he was smiling.

A lot.

Susie pointed toward his ears.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

Kiro frowned.

She leaned closer again.

Susieto Kiro

“YOUR EARS.”

He touched one.

They were standing almost completely upright.

Kiroto Susie

“Oh.”

Susie laughed.

Kiroto Susie

“Fuck you.”

He couldn't hear whether she answered.

Probably something rude.

They found a place slightly off to the side.

Not right against the stage.

Not trapped near the back either.

Susie had probably chosen it deliberately.

Kiro noticed.

Didn't mention it.

His paw was no longer on hers.

He noticed that too.

Immediately.

Don't.

He shoved both paws into the pockets of his jacket.

The red plaid shirt underneath was already getting too warm.

He should have left the jacket in the truck.

Too late now.

At first, Kiro didn't know what to do with himself.

Everyone else seemed to.

Heads moving.

Bodies swaying.

A few people near the stage jumping.

Someone behind them knew every word.

Kiro just stood there.

Watching.

Listening.

Thinking about the fact that he was standing there watching and listening.

You look fucking stupid.

His shoulders tightened.

Everyone can tell you've never done this.

Someone bumped him.

Kiro moved.

Then another person stepped in front of him.

His thoughts kept trying.

You're just standing there.

Do something.

Not that.

That's worse.

Then the drummer hit something hard.

The entire room seemed to move with it.

Kiro's thoughts vanished.

Just for a second.

Another hit.

Guitar.

Bass.

Noise.

His tail moved once behind him.

Then again.

Kiro didn't notice.

Susie did.

She looked over.

Kiro's foot had started tapping.

Then his shoulders.

Small.

Barely anything.

The next song was faster.

Something about it caught him.

Kiro stopped watching what everyone else was doing.

For the first time since entering, he wasn't thinking about whether he belonged here.

He was listening.

Actually listening.

His head moved with the rhythm.

His tail started moving properly now.

Susie smiled.

Kiro caught her.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

She shook her head.

Susieto Kiro

“Nothing.”

He leaned toward her.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

Susieto Kiro

“I SAID NOTHING.”

Kiro narrowed his eyes.

Kiroto Susie

“You were looking at me.”

Susie leaned closer to his ear.

Susieto Kiro

“YOU'RE HAVING FUN.”

Kiro opened his mouth.

Stopped.

Looked toward the stage.

Then back at her.

Kiroto Susie

“YEAH.”

Susie's smile got bigger.

Kiro looked away before his face could betray him further.

By the end of the opening set, he was sweating.

Kiro pulled his jacket off.

Susie took one look at his red plaid shirt.

Susieto Kiro

“Better.”

He frowned.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

She leaned toward him.

Susieto Kiro

“I SAID IT LOOKS BETTER WITHOUT THE JACKET.”

Kiro stared.

Susie looked innocent.

His ears heated immediately.

Kiroto Susie

“Fuck you.”

Susieto Kiro

“What?”

He knew she heard that.

She smiled.

Kiro tied the jacket around his waist.

Kiroto Susie

“You're awful.”

Susie cupped one paw beside her ear.

Susieto Kiro

“CAN'T HEAR YOU.”

Kiroto Susie

“GOOD.”

The break between bands felt almost too quiet.

Almost.

People talked loudly enough to compensate.

Kiro's ears rang slightly.

He rubbed one.

Susie handed him a bottle of water.

Susieto Kiro

“Drink.”

Kiroto Susie

“Bossy.”

Susieto Kiro

“Drink.”

Kiro did.

His heart was beating fast.

But not wrong.

Not panic.

Not that burning, trapped feeling.

This was different.

His whole body felt awake.

Susie watched him.

Susieto Kiro

“So?”

Kiro lowered the bottle.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

Susieto Kiro

“You hate it?”

Kiroto Susie

“No.”

A smile started before he could stop it.

Kiroto Susie

“No, this is fucking great.”

Susie laughed.

Susieto Kiro

“Told you.”

Kiroto Susie

“You didn't tell me it feels like getting hit by music.”

Susieto Kiro

“That's the selling point.”

Kiro looked toward the stage.

People were changing equipment.

Someone tested a guitar.

A sharp sound came through the speakers.

Kiro's ears twitched.

Kiroto Susie

“I get it now.”

Susieto Kiro

“What?”

Kiroto Susie

“Why people keep doing this.”

Susie smiled.

Susieto Kiro

“Wait until the actual band starts.”

Kiro looked at her.

Kiroto Susie

“That wasn't the actual band?”

She stared.

Susieto Kiro

“I told you there was an opener.”

Kiroto Susie

“You told me a lot of things.”

Susieto Kiro

“Do you listen to anything I say?”

Kiroto Susie

“Sometimes.”

Susieto Kiro

“Great.”

He drank more water.

Then looked around.

Still crowded.

Still loud.

Still too many people.

But somehow...

Okay.

Susie noticed him scanning the room.

Susieto Kiro

“You need outside?”

Kiro thought about it.

Actually thought.

Kiroto Susie

“No.”

Susieto Kiro

“You sure?”

Kiroto Susie

“Yeah.”

He smiled faintly.

Kiroto Susie

“I want to stay.”

Susie nodded.

Susieto Kiro

“Okay.”

That little word again.

No praise.

No I'm proud of you.

Just okay.

Kiro liked that.

The main band came out ten minutes later.

The room changed immediately.

People moved forward.

Kiro wasn't ready.

The crowd shifted around him.

Someone pushed past his left side.

Another body crossed between him and Susie.

Their shoulders separated.

Kiro looked over.

Susie was there.

Then someone moved again.

Not there.

Kiro's stomach dropped.

Kiroto Susie

“Susie?”

Nobody heard him.

He tried moving toward where he'd last seen her.

Someone stepped backward into him.

Kiro

“Sorry.”

Kiro barely heard himself.

More people moved.

Too close.

The room suddenly felt smaller.

Hotter.

His breathing changed.

Where is she?

He looked toward the door.

Couldn't see it.

Where the fuck is the door?

Someone's shoulder hit his chest.

Kiro stepped back.

His ears flattened.

Kiroto Susie

“Susie?”

Nothing.

The band started.

The crowd shouted.

Sound exploded through the room.

Kiro couldn't find her.

His paws tingled.

Fuck.

Then something grabbed his paw.

Kiro flinched hard.

Turned.

Susie.

She was pushing between two people toward him.

Susieto Kiro

“There.”

Kiro stared at her.

She pulled him closer.

Susieto Kiro

“Lost you.”

He couldn't hear her properly.

Didn't matter.

He understood.

Kiro closed his paw around hers.

Hard.

Probably too hard.

Susie didn't complain.

She moved them slightly farther to the side.

Away from the thickest part of the crowd.

Kiro followed.

His breathing slowly started working again.

Susie leaned close.

Susieto Kiro

“You okay?”

Kiro nodded.

Too quickly.

She kept looking at him.

He tried again.

Kiroto Susie

“Yeah.”

She couldn't hear.

Kiro brought his mouth closer to her ear.

Kiroto Susie

“I'm okay.”

Susie nodded.

Then she started to loosen her grip.

Kiro's fingers tightened automatically.

She stopped.

Kiro noticed what he'd done.

His face heated.

Kiroto Susie

“Sorry.”

Susie looked down at their paws.

Then back at him.

She didn't let go.

Instead, she adjusted her grip.

Fingers properly between his.

Kiro stared.

Susie looked toward the stage.

Like nothing happened.

His heart did something stupid.

Again.

The band was louder.

Much louder.

Kiro expected his head to hate it.

Instead, there wasn't enough room inside him for anything else.

No Evan.

No Jamie.

No father.

No old messages.

No gun.

No:

Kiro’s exmessageto Kiro

You pushed me away.

Just drums.

Guitar.

Bass.

Heat.

Susie's paw in his.

Kiro smiled.

Then laughed.

He didn't even know why.

Susie looked toward him.

He shook his head.

Nothing.

He started moving again.

Less cautiously now.

Nobody cared.

That was the strange part.

Nobody fucking cared.

Nobody was watching him.

Everyone was too busy being loud themselves.

A woman beside him was screaming along.

Someone farther ahead was dancing terribly.

A guy near the wall had his eyes closed the entire time.

Nobody cared.

Kiro's shoulders loosened.

His tail moved freely behind him.

He bounded slightly with the rhythm.

Susie joined him.

Not exaggerated.

Just enough.

Their joined paws moved between them.

At some point Kiro forgot he was holding her.

It just became part of everything.

Several songs passed.

Kiro had no idea how many.

Three?

Five?

Maybe eight.

Time didn't feel particularly useful anymore.

During one slower song, the crowd settled slightly.

More space opened between people.

Nobody was pushing them apart now.

Kiro finally looked down.

Their paws were still together.

He stared.

Susie's fingers rested between his.

No reason anymore.

They weren't getting separated.

There was plenty of space.

She could let go.

So could he.

Kiro looked at her.

Susie was watching the stage.

Then she felt him looking.

Turned.

Her eyes moved down.

Their paws.

Kiro waited.

Susie waited.

Neither moved.

Kiro's thumb brushed against hers.

Small.

Deliberate this time.

Susie's expression changed slightly.

Not a smile exactly.

Something softer.

Her finger tightened around his.

Kiro looked back toward the stage.

His ears were burning.

Okay.

He smiled.

Okay.

The next song was fast again.

Kiro recognized nothing.

Didn't need to.

He moved with everyone else.

Susie moved beside him.

At one point she shouted something.

Kiro leaned toward her.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

She shouted again.

Still nothing.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

Susie grabbed the front of his red plaid shirt and pulled him closer.

Kiro nearly forgot where he was.

Her mouth beside his ear.

Susieto Kiro

“I SAID YOU LOOK HAPPY.”

Then she let go of his shirt.

Kiro stared at her.

Susie smiled.

Kiro felt his entire face heat.

Kiroto Susie

“FUCK YOU.”

She laughed.

Kiro started laughing too.

The next hit of bass went straight through his chest.

For once, his heart racing didn't scare him.

The final song ended too quickly.

Kiro genuinely thought there would be another.

People shouted.

Clapped.

Someone called for one more.

Kiro joined without thinking.

Susie looked at him.

He realized what he'd done.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

She smiled.

Susieto Kiro

“Nothing.”

Kiroto Susie

“Stop fucking doing that.”

The band came back for one more.

Kiro grinned.

When the lights finally came up properly, everything felt strange.

Too visible.

Too normal.

People started moving toward the exit.

Kiro stood still.

Sweaty.

Hair messy.

Ears ringing.

Red plaid shirt sticking slightly to his back.

Susie squeezed his paw.

Only then did he realize.

Still holding it.

Kiro looked down.

Then at her.

Kiroto Susie

“You know we're not going to get separated anymore?”

Susie looked around at the thinning crowd.

Susieto Kiro

“Probably not.”

Neither let go.

Kiro raised an eyebrow.

Susie raised hers.

He smiled.

Kiroto Susie

“Okay.”

Susieto Kiro

“Okay.”

They stared toward the exit.

Still holding paws.

Cold air hit Kiro like water.

He breathed in sharply.

Kiro

“Jesus.”

Susie laughed beside him.

People gathered outside.

Smoking.

Talking.

Trying to hear each other over ears that were probably just as destroyed as Kiro's.

He rubbed one of his.

Everything sounded slightly distant.

Susie said something.

Kiro frowned.

Kiroto Susie

“What?”

She stepped closer.

Susieto Kiro

“HOW WAS IT?”

Kiroto Susie

“You don't have to scream anymore.”

Susie stared.

Susieto Kiro

“What?”

Kiro laughed.

Kiroto Susie

“Never mind.”

They walked away from the entrance.

The music was still audible through the walls.

Muted now.

Kiro looked back once.

Then again.

Susie noticed.

Susieto Kiro

“So?”

Kiro looked at her.

He thought about everything he'd expected.

Crowd.

Panic.

Wanting to leave.

Feeling stupid.

And some of that had happened.

But then.

The floor moving under him.

His thoughts disappearing beneath the music.

Nobody caring what he looked like.

Susie finding him.

Her paw.

Kiro smiled.

Kiroto Susie

“I want to do that again.”

Susie's expression softened.

Susieto Kiro

“Yeah?”

Kiroto Susie

“Yeah.”

Then immediately.

Kiroto Susie

“Not tomorrow.”

She laughed.

Susieto Kiro

“My ears need to recover.”

Kiroto Susie

“Old man.”

Kiroto Susie

“I'm three months older than you.”

Susieto Kiro

“Ancient.”

Kiro pointed at her.

Kiroto Susie

“Your knees are permanently broken.”

Susieto Kiro

“Your neck is permanently broken.”

Kiroto Susie

“Fuck.”

She smiled.

They kept walking.

The Ranger was still a few blocks away.

Their paws remained together between them.

Kiro looked down at them once.

This time he didn't overthink it.

Not much.

After a while, he said:

Kiroto Susie

“Thanks.”

Susie looked toward him.

Susieto Kiro

“For what?”

Kiroto Susie

“For taking me.”

She shrugged.

Susieto Kiro

“You wanted to go.”

Kiroto Susie

“Still.”

Kiro looked ahead.

Kiroto Susie

“I probably would've kept saying someday forever.”

Susie stayed quiet for a second.

Then:

Susieto Kiro

“I wanted you there.”

Kiro's steps slowed.

Not stopped.

Just slower.

He looked toward her.

Susie was looking straight ahead now.

Maybe deliberately.

Kiro swallowed.

Kiroto Susie

“Yeah?”

Susieto Kiro

“Yeah.”

Something warm moved through his chest.

Not adrenaline anymore.

Something quieter.

He squeezed her paw.

Susie squeezed back.

Neither said anything else.

They walked toward the old green Ranger together.

Kiro's ears were ringing.

His throat hurt from shouting.

His whole body felt tired.

And underneath all of it, the music was still there.

So was her paw.

✶end of chapter 26✶
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