KIRO’S STORY / CHAPTER 10 OF 36
Quiet
by hasira · about 6 min read
Kiro didn't remember falling asleep.
One moment there was thunder.
Rain against the windows.
Susie's head against his shoulder.
Her breathing.
Slow.
Warm.
The television glowing quietly across the room.
Kiro's eyes became heavier.
Don't get used to this.
“...Shut up.”
Then nothing.
Kiro opened his eyes.
The television was still on.
The movie menu hadn't changed.
Rain still hit the windows.
Thunder somewhere outside.
But Susie was gone.
Kiro looked beside himself.
Empty couch.
“...Susie?”
Nothing.
He sat up.
The house felt wrong.
Too quiet.
Kiro looked toward the hallway.
“Susie?”
No answer.
His phone was on the table.
He grabbed it.
No messages.
No missed calls.
Nothing from Rin.
Nothing from Susie.
Kiro stared at the screen.
Of course.
“No.”
She left.
“She was sleeping.”
Not anymore.
Kiro stood.
“Shut up.”
She woke up.
Looked at you.
Realized what she was doing.
His grip tightened around the phone.
“No.”
And left.
Kiro threw the phone onto the couch.
“Stop.”
Another voice.
Closer.
Why would she stay?
Kiro froze.
Look at you.
He squeezed his eyes shut.
“Not tonight.”
Pathetic.
His claws extended.
Rin has to babysit you.
“No.”
Susie feels sorry for you.
Kiro dug his claws into his palms.
“Shut up.”
You pass out.
You cry.
You apologize for fucking everything.
“Stop.”
Everyone has to take care of you.
Kiro scratched at his arm.
Sharp pain.
His breathing caught.
For half a second...
quiet.
He stared down.
Then the thoughts returned.
Louder.
THAT'S IT?
Kiro's expression changed.
“No...”
Can't even make your own head shut up.
Again.
His claws dragged across his arms.
Then his legs.
More marks.
More blood appearing through the fur.
Kiro stopped looking.
He just wanted the noise somewhere else.
Anywhere else.
But it followed him.
Nobody needs you.
“Shut up.”
Nobody wants this.
Another scratch.
Rin will get tired of you.
“Stop.”
Susie will too.
Kiro pulled harder.
“SHUT UP.”
Why would anyone fucking love you?
Kiro froze.
His paws were shaking.
Blood ran slowly through the fur on his arms.
The pain was there.
Clear.
Simple.
It should have helped.
It didn't.
The voices were still there.
Kiro looked toward the desk.
Something small lay among the papers.
A blade.
His stomach tightened.
“No.”
Coward.
Kiro looked away.
You wanted quiet.
“No.”
Then fucking do something.
His breathing broke.
He grabbed the sides of his head.
“Please.”
Memories started hitting him.
His mother on the kitchen floor.
Blood between the tiles.
His father.
The mirror.
Rin's scars.
His own arms.
The birthday party.
Everyone turning toward him.
Rin holding his paw.
Susie sitting across from him.
“I wanted to stay.”
Kiro shook his head.
“Stop.”
Susie laughing.
Susie walking beside him through the forest.
Susie on the roof.
Susie asleep against his shoulder.
“It actually looks good.”
Kiro grabbed the blade.
SHE DOESN'T MEAN IT.
“Shut up.”
NONE OF THEM DO.
Kiro hurt himself again.
Something sharper.
Something worse.
The pain spread.
Blood followed.
But the thoughts didn't disappear.
They screamed over it.
USELESS.
PATHETIC.
BURDEN.
FUCKING DISGUSTING.
Kiro dropped the blade.
It hit the floor.
“Please...”
His voice was barely there.
YOU DON'T DESERVE THEM.
YOU DON'T DESERVE ANYONE.
YOU SHOULD HAVE ENDED THIS YEARS AGO.
Kiro stared at the blood on his paws.
His eyes went empty.
“No.”
THEN DO IT NOW.
Silence.
Kiro slowly looked toward the stairs.
The window was already open.
He didn't remember opening it.
Cold rain entered the room.
Kiro climbed through.
The roof.
Their roof.
No.
His roof.
Where Susie had been sitting only hours ago.
The rain was heavier now.
Blood washed slowly from his fur and disappeared between the wet tiles.
Kiro walked toward the edge.
The town below looked distant.
Small.
Lights blurred by rain.
Thunder rolled somewhere above him.
Kiro looked down toward the place where Susie had sat.
For a moment...
She was there.
Legs pulled close.
Looking toward the forest.
“This is nice.”
Kiro blinked.
Gone.
Rin appeared instead.
Sitting beside him.
“Because you're my friend and you collapsed.”
Gone.
Susie again.
“I wanted to stay.”
Gone.
Kiro covered his ears.
“Please...”
THEY'LL LEAVE.
EVERYONE DOES.
“Stop.”
YOU'LL RUIN THEM TOO.
Kiro closed his eyes.
A tear moved down his cheek.
“I know.”
His toes reached the edge.
Nothing beyond them.
Wind pushed against him.
Kiro loosened his body.
Just slightly.
Forward.
His stomach lifted.
For one strange second...
nothing.
No voices.
No rain.
No memories.
No Kiro.
Then the ground rushed toward him.
Impact.
Hard.
The world disappeared into pain.
His body hit the ground wrong.
A crack.
Then another.
For a moment, everything flashed white.
Kiro couldn't breathe.
Couldn't move.
Rain hit his face.
Blood spread beneath him, thin at first, then mixing with the water across the ground.
His vision shook.
The roof was above him now.
Far away.
The open window looked impossibly small.
Kiro tried to move one paw.
Nothing.
A breath escaped him.
Wet.
Broken.
Then the ground beneath him changed.
Cold.
Deeper.
Kiro blinked.
The house was gone.
The roof was gone.
Dark water surrounded him.
For a second, he didn't understand.
Then his body started sinking.
Kiro moved his arms.
Slowly at first.
Then harder.
He tried to swim upward.
There was light somewhere above him.
Weak.
Far away.
Kiro kicked.
Reached.
Almost moved closer.
Then something grabbed his leg.
He froze.
Looked down.
Nothing.
Only darkness.
But something was pulling.
Down.
Kiro kicked harder.
“No...”
Bubbles escaped his mouth.
The light moved farther away.
He reached toward it.
His claws extended.
Nothing to hold.
Something pulled again.
Harder.
Kiro fought it.
His chest burned.
His lungs screamed.
He tried to swim.
Tried to kick.
Tried to move anywhere except down.
But the darkness kept taking him.
Then he heard something.
“Kiro?”
The voice came from above the water.
Distant.
Broken.
Kiro looked up.
Susie.
“Kiro?”
He tried to answer.
Only bubbles came out.
The thing around his leg tightened.
Pulled him deeper.
Kiro reached upward again.
“Kiro.”
Closer now.
Something touched his shoulder.
The water shook around him.
“Kiro, wake up.”
He struggled harder.
His movement became weaker.
His chest hurt.
Everything hurt.
He couldn't reach the surface.
Couldn't even tell if he was getting closer anymore.
“Kiro?”
Panic entered her voice.
“Kiro!”
Something shook him.
The water moved violently.
Kiro kicked again.
Once.
Twice.
Nothing.
The darkness below felt endless.
His arms slowed.
His legs stopped fighting.
Just stop.
Kiro stared at the light above him.
Susie's voice kept coming through the water.
“Kiro, fucking wake up!”
He tried one last time.
His paw reached upward.
Not even close.
His body sank farther.
Kiro stopped moving.
The burning in his chest became unbearable.
Then...
he gave up.
His arms floated beside him.
His eyes stayed open.
The light above became smaller.
Smaller.
Smaller.
Blood slowly drifted from his nose.
Then from the corner of his mouth.
Dark clouds spread through the water around his face.
“Kiro!”
His body continued sinking.
Susie's voice broke.
“Please!”
Kiro looked toward the disappearing light.
He wanted to answer.
Wanted to tell her he could hear her.
Nothing happened.
More blood left his mouth.
The water swallowed him.
“Kiro!”
Something shook him again.
Harder.
But he was already too deep.
Too tired.
The light disappeared.
And Kiro stopped trying to reach it.